Posted in Reflections

Cyclic Patterns- Reflection

Posted on by Ester

Recently, I found myself getting caught in a web of the same cyclic pattern in my life and I wanted to share my reflections.

Andrii Lobur 

By definition cyclic patterns refer to ‘events that happen in a particular order, one following the other, and are often repeated’. To me it feels like a gift you rejected but it came back on your doorstep with different packaging, you still feel excited when you receive it, but after unwrapping it, you feel disappointed but unsurprised.

You get caught in the web of internal fear that manifests itself into reality and in that moment you depersonalise, standing and watching the situation you feared unfold before your eyes.

It can be desensitising, you can wonder ‘is this my place’, but yet you can still be fearful and feel immense anxiety by the possibility of being stuck in the same place forever like a sort of twisted fate. 

However, one thing I have gotten into the habit of is in the situation where I feel caught and my worries become uncontrollable, I accept the emotions that I feel, validating my experience, and rather than internalising a sense of failure and inadequacy for being in such situations. I show myself compassion, with thoughts telling me that it will get better, and an opportunity will arise that will balance out or prove wrong the fears I carry. 

Update (20.05.24): I would like to share a self-help exercise for offering self-compassion, go through this process when you are feeling a sense of threat in your life. Say or write to yourself: 

  1. “This is a moment of suffering” – A moment of mindfulness and validation is offered here instead of rumination
  2. “Suffering is a part of the line” – Being a human means there will always be good and bad moments
  3. “May I be kind to myself” – Closure, what can you say to yourself or do that would be helpful at this moment? 

Click Here to read more about it.

I was able to learn that as there are patterns of me feeling and getting stuck, there are also patterns that I followed to help me get unstuck. It’s empowering to know this and it makes me feel more confident that I will be able to push through with resilience and a growth mindset.

Can You Relate?

Jess Bailey Designs 
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Author:

Welcome to my webpage. My name is Ester, and I write all of the posts you see here, I am a certified coach, as well as an EQ facilitator and mentor. I graduated with a BSc in Management (Sustainable and Ethical Business) but my strongest points were in leadership in practice mainly reflections I had to make regarding social and psychological dynamics in the workplace. I am about to start my Msc in Business and Organisational Psychology working on launching services in Executive coaching and OD consultancy. I started this blog mainly because I deeply care about my community's capability to feel comfortable learning more about themselves which can aid them to learn about others. Social and emotional learning is not easily accessible or easy to digest. I spent a lot of my early years reflecting and observing my surroundings. I spend a lot of my time building self-knowledge to help me through the various cycles of my life. It is a difficult journey, especially for those who are not used to the vulnerability required for us to grow. Using my personal knowledge and what I have learnt through my studies I hope to provide digestible and valuable content. But more importantly create a small well connected community where we can talk about where we are at in life and cheerlead each other into positive transformation.

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